A Letter to God --6

LORD, You who had anguished me again and again
You who put Your heart in this melancholic
Refresh me once again with Your spirit
For Your burden is too big to discharge


See the stirred emotion and take it
Broken and anguished,
See my efforts to discharge it
And see the fruitlessness of it


Why should people stumble because of me?
Why should encouragement turned into arguments?
Are You not the God of peace?
The one who call us to have peace


You insert in me Your heart,
and in my zeal I will discharge it,
but see my lack of skills, my lack of effectiveness,
and change it, convict me of foolishness if I'm unwise
And convict me if I ever lose control.


For all I want is to encourage, to build
see the refusal in me to destroy, the unnoticed desire of the body
See the hardened,
See the stubborn,
See the wise,
And do not let me go off my composure.


I will be faithful in nurturing people,
I will do Your ways, just convict me
Turn Your face away from me if You are angry
For I fear my foolishness.

LORD, my GOD,
I will do Your way,
all my complains be it to You, be it not to man,
Help me to love, to look beyond the flesh into the spirit
For there is where I want to love
And examine my heart, take away the hurt, pain, anger, anguish, sorrow and dirge of my soul
And help me to dwell in Your secret place,
where I will see Your face,
where I will see Your calling,
where I will see Your wisdom and comfort
And forever strengthen me.